Hercules is strong. But like the rest of us, he needs help every now and again.

One day Hercules was outside and he saw a nasty-looking beast rear its head on the side of the road. He took his club and smashed the beast’s head. To his surprise, the beast grew three heads instead of one. He struck it again and this time it grew six heads. The harder and faster Hercules struck, the larger the beast grew. Suddenly, Athena appeared. “Hercules!, Can’t you see? Stop hitting Strife (the monster)! Keep hitting him and he grows. Leave him and he returns to its original size.”

In William Ury’s “Power of a Positive No” the example illustrates how reacting to someone during an argument will cause them to get angrier. I think of the myriad situations in our lives that invite knee-jerk reactions or negative emotions because of the lack of control over our circumstances. Strife means turmoil, upset, uncertainty. You can’t think or see clearly. It’s Hercules beating the beast without noticing how big it’s growing (i.e. constant action in the wrong direction.)

Sometimes things happen that we don’t understand (Why did I suddenly lose my job? Why has this illness befallen me?) How often do we react, keep trying to fix things, worrying ourselves to death? We act like Hercules when we don’t understand the more we react, the more things spiral out of control. Leaving it alone for a while, retreating and coming back with a clearer head (or three) is a wiser option. It’s better to think about the solutions without stress or angst and focus on your needs, the larger goal at hand.

Next time you’re in a bind and can’t find a way out, remember Hercules and the beast.